And Why It’s Actually an Awakening
Midlife. For many of us, it feels like a big question mark, a time when everything we’ve built in our lives suddenly starts to feel… not quite right. The “midlife crisis” is something we hear about often—usually depicted as a time of panic, confusion, or regret. But what if I told you that what you’re feeling isn’t a crisis at all? What if it’s actually an awakening?
1. What Is a Midlife Crisis Really?
The typical portrayal of a midlife crisis often involves impulsive decisions, a sudden urge to make dramatic changes, and, in many cases, feelings of regret or panic. But here’s the thing—this so-called “crisis” can actually be the first step toward deep, personal transformation.
In truth, a midlife crisis is often the soul’s way of calling us to something bigger, deeper, and more authentic. It’s not about falling apart, but shedding old layers and rediscovering who we are at the core.
When I first hit midlife, I didn’t feel like I was in a “crisis,” but I definitely felt like something was missing. It wasn’t until I had my own faith crisis, leaving behind the beliefs and expectations I had carried for so long, that I realized how much of my life had been based on someone else’s plan. I had spent years living according to the rules and values of others—whether that was my family’s expectations, society’s norms, or the doctrines of the faith I had once followed so passionately.
Leaving Mormonism in 2019 was a huge turning point for me. At the time, I thought I was simply breaking free from a belief system that no longer served me. But looking back, I see it as a powerful awakening to my own truth. That “crisis” wasn’t just a breaking down—it was a breaking free.
It was through energy healing, especially Reiki, that I found my way back to myself. I discovered that healing wasn’t just about managing chronic illness; it was about reconnecting with my true self, shedding the layers of other people’s expectations, and coming into alignment with what I truly wanted out of life.
I now see midlife as an opportunity to rewrite my story, to live authentically, and to support other women in doing the same. The journey has had its challenges, but it has also been the most rewarding chapter of my life.
2. The Awakening Process: Shifting from Crisis to Clarity
Instead of viewing midlife as something to fear, think of it as an invitation to awaken to your true self. It’s a time to release outdated beliefs and reconnect with your desires, passions, and life’s true purpose.
This process may feel uncomfortable at times—like you’re questioning everything you’ve known about yourself—but that discomfort is part of the growth. You’re being called to something more aligned with who you really are.
For years, I felt like I was moving through life in a fog. I had this nagging sense that something was off, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. I was doing all the things I thought I was supposed to—being a good wife, mom, and professional—but it all felt like it lacked meaning. I thought maybe it was just part of being a busy mom and juggling multiple roles, but the feeling of disconnection lingered.
It wasn’t until I left Mormonism in 2019 that I started to realize how deep that disconnect went. The rules and expectations I had followed for so long—both spiritual and societal—weren’t aligned with my true self. But even after stepping away from those structures, I still felt lost. I was free from the old confines, but I had no idea who I was without them.
The breakthrough for me came when I discovered Reiki and energy healing. These practices helped me begin to tune into myself on a deeper level. For the first time in a long time, I felt like I was in the process of remembering who I had been all along. It wasn’t an instant transformation, but gradually, I began to feel more connected to my own energy and desires.
Looking back, I realize that feeling disconnected wasn’t a problem to fix; it was a signal that I was being called to rediscover my own truth. It was as if I was finally being given the space to come home to myself, and that’s where the real healing began.
3. The Signs That Your “Crisis” Is Actually an Awakening
It’s easy to get caught up in feelings of frustration, confusion, and even guilt, but these emotions are actually part of the awakening process. Here are a few signs that your “midlife crisis” is really just the beginning of a new, more aligned chapter:
- Increased Self-Reflection: You start questioning everything—your career, relationships, and life choices. This is not a sign of failure; it’s a sign of growth. The need for introspection is a powerful tool for self-discovery.
- Old Dreams Resurfacing: Suddenly, passions you buried years ago are coming to the surface. Maybe it’s an old hobby or career dream that you thought was too late to pursue. This is your soul reminding you of your true desires.
- Emotional Release: You may feel like you’re going through a range of emotions—grief, frustration, joy, relief. These emotions are part of the clearing process, making room for transformation and growth.
Once I began exploring energy healing, I realized how much fun it could be to tap into myself in a new way. It was like opening a door to a whole new world of possibilities, where I wasn’t bound by the limiting beliefs I had carried for years. I started experimenting with new ideas and perspectives, but also revisiting old ones—ones that had been squashed or dismissed when I was younger.
I remember feeling this rush of excitement as I tapped into my intuition for the first time. It wasn’t just about finding answers, but about playing with the possibilities, questioning things I had been taught to accept as truth, and challenging my own perceptions. Reiki, along with other energy healing practices, became my playground. I allowed myself to explore what felt right, without guilt or fear of judgment.
One of the most liberating parts of this journey was revisiting the beliefs I had been told to “outgrow” as a child. There were parts of me—creative, curious, intuitive—that I had been conditioned to suppress. But when I started embracing those qualities again, it was like reawakening a part of my soul I’d long forgotten. I experimented with different healing techniques, explored new spiritual ideas, and allowed myself to reframe my beliefs. It was thrilling to realize that I could create my own spiritual path, one that felt true to who I really was, not who I was supposed to be.
In many ways, it was like learning to walk again, but with a sense of freedom and joy that I hadn’t felt in years. Each step was an exciting exploration of what felt right, and it made me realize just how much potential we all have to reinvent ourselves at any age.
4. Midlife as a Time to Realign with Your True Purpose
In midlife, you’re being given the opportunity to realign with your true purpose. The old story you’ve been telling yourself—about who you should be, what you should do, and how you should live—may no longer fit. This is your chance to create a life that truly reflects your authentic desires.
Energy healing, like Reiki, can help you realign and clear out the blockages keeping you stuck in old patterns. It’s a powerful tool for reconnecting with your inner wisdom and uncovering the path that will lead to the most fulfilling version of your life.
As a child, I was fiery—passionate, outspoken, and full of energy. If I didn’t get what I wanted, I didn’t hold back. I had tantrums, big ones. I was loud, I was messy, and I was unapologetic about it. But instead of being met with understanding or support, I was often shut down. My mom, who couldn’t handle the intensity of my emotions, would put me in time out—alone in an empty bathtub, the lights off, the door shut. I remember feeling so small and unheard, like my emotions were too much for anyone to handle.
Over time, I learned to bury that fiery part of myself. I was conditioned to be the “peacemaker,” to calm down, to keep the peace and not cause a scene. That energetic, loud, passionate side of me was pushed aside in favor of being more “manageable.” I became more reserved, more controlled, and less willing to express my truth. But deep down, I knew something was missing. I felt disconnected from who I really was—the woman who wasn’t afraid to speak up, be bold, and express her passions fully.
It wasn’t until I began practicing energy healing, especially Reiki, that I started to reconnect with that fierce, untamed part of myself. As I worked through my own healing, I realized that I wasn’t meant to be a peacemaker—I was meant to be fiery. I began allowing myself to feel and express that passion again, without guilt or shame. It wasn’t about tantrums anymore; it was about channeling that raw energy into things that truly mattered to me—speaking my truth, asserting my boundaries, and being unapologetically loud about what I wanted in life.
Reconnecting with that fiery part of me has been incredibly liberating. I’ve learned to embrace the intensity and passion that was once shut down. Instead of trying to control my emotions, I’ve learned to honor them. I allow myself to be spontaneous, to speak my mind, and to be fully present in my own energy. That fiery, bold version of me is not just a part of my past—it’s the very essence of who I am now, and I’m finally letting her shine.
5. The Power of Letting Go of the “Old You”
One of the most transformative aspects of midlife is the opportunity to let go of the person you used to be. This isn’t about erasing your past—it’s about shedding the parts of yourself that no longer serve you.
It’s not easy, but releasing old beliefs, toxic relationships, or outdated goals is a necessary part of aligning with who you truly are.
When I first began learning Reiki and diving into meditation, I had no idea just how much these practices would change my life. At that point, my world had been turned upside down. Leaving behind the beliefs and structure of my former life was like having the rug yanked out from under me. I was left in a place of uncertainty, unsure of who I was without the identity that had been shaped by religion, family expectations, and societal norms.
I felt untethered—like I was floating in a sea of unknowns. That’s when Reiki and meditation became my lifeline. Reiki, in particular, offered me a soft space to land. It didn’t require me to have all the answers or know exactly where I was going—it simply allowed me to be, in the moment, with all my emotions and confusion. It helped me ground myself in a way that nothing else could. I learned to connect with my own energy, to feel the flow of life force within me, and to trust that I was still whole, even when everything else around me felt broken.
Through Reiki and meditation, I began to rebuild my sense of safety and stability. Meditation allowed me the stillness to reflect and process everything I was going through. It became my space to let go of the anxiety and fear that came with leaving behind a life that no longer served me. I started to trust the process and know that healing was happening, even if I couldn’t always see it. I didn’t need to have everything figured out—I just needed to trust in the energy that was already within me.
These practices didn’t erase the challenges I faced, but they gave me a sense of peace and grounding in the midst of the chaos. Reiki taught me to be present with my body, to listen to what it needed, and to honor my feelings without judgment. Slowly, I began to feel like I was stepping into a new version of myself—one that was more aligned with my true essence, not the person I thought I was supposed to be.
Looking back, I see how pivotal Reiki and meditation were in my healing journey. They weren’t just tools for relaxation—they were tools for transformation. They helped me reclaim my power and reconnect with my inner strength. And most importantly, they gave me a way to navigate this new phase of life with grace, even when it felt like the ground beneath me was shifting.
6. The Roadmap: Steps to Embrace Your Midlife Awakening
So, how do you begin embracing your midlife awakening? Here’s a roadmap to help guide you through the process:
- Practice Self-Compassion: It’s okay to not have it all figured out. Midlife is about learning to love and trust yourself, even in the face of uncertainty.
- Get Curious About Your Desires: Take the time to explore what truly lights you up. What have you always wanted to do but never made the time for? Start small—baby steps count.
- Energy Healing: Practices like Reiki can help you clear the energetic blockages that keep you stuck, allowing you to align with your true self and purpose.
- Set Intentions: Start setting clear intentions for how you want to move forward. What does your ideal life look like? Write it down and begin taking steps toward it.
Leaving the structure of religion was one of the hardest decisions I ever made. For so long, I had been tied to beliefs and practices that didn’t align with who I was at my core. The fear, guilt, and control I felt in that space were suffocating. It wasn’t an easy choice, but I knew I had to let go of something that no longer served me.
Once I stepped away from that toxicity, I embraced spirituality instead—something that felt more expansive, liberating, and true to my essence. It was like finally breathing deeply after being held in a vice for years. I started trusting in the energy of the universe, reconnecting with my intuition, and discovering a new sense of peace. Letting go of what didn’t serve me wasn’t just freeing—it was transformative.
My Advice for Navigating Awakening:
One of the most freeing lessons I’ve learned during this journey is that it’s okay to change your mind. Life isn’t about having all the answers upfront—it’s about experimenting, exploring, and being willing to try new things. If something doesn’t resonate or work, that’s okay. Move on and try something else! Don’t be afraid to pivot, adjust, and follow what feels aligned for you. Trust that every step, even the missteps, is part of your growth.
If you’re feeling stuck or uncertain, remember: You are allowed to evolve. Take a deep breath, trust the process, and give yourself the permission to change course. Start small, and be gentle with yourself.
Conclusion: A New Beginning, Not an End
Midlife doesn’t have to be feared. It’s not the end of the road—it’s the beginning of a new chapter, one filled with potential and possibilities. The so-called “crisis” is really a gift—an opportunity to wake up to the life you were always meant to live.
If you’re feeling stuck or unsure of where to begin, I invite you to explore the process of energy healing and intuitive coaching with me. Let’s work together to unlock the true, aligned version of YOU.
Schedule a FREE consultation to figure out your next step in handling your midlife changes.
